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Re: All the Little Lights by Bertholdt Hoover
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Re: All the Little Lights by Bertholdt Hoover
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Re: All the Little Lights by Annie Leonhardt
[June 02, 2020, 11:16:44 PM]


Re: All the Little Lights by Bertholdt Hoover
[June 02, 2020, 08:32:33 PM]

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1
Wall Rose / Re: All the Little Lights
« Last post by Bertholdt Hoover on Today at 02:50:31 PM »
Annie's hands appeared to be in no different condition than normal. She still worked and trained like the rest of them. Yet, he understood her point. They had provided a respite in her stress-burning activities, and Bert was glad he could play a part in such a thing.

Bertholdt let out a meaningless sigh, his breath floating in the air before him in the form of a small tuft of mist. Despite the icy looks and attitude she provided towards everyone else, the warmth Annie gave him, both literally and figuratively, was invaluable. Annie, herself, didn't seem to understand that she made Bert happy, treating every time he said so in a manner slightly less befuddled than if he'd spoken a foreign language.

"I don't think I've ever heard you say the word Love before." Bert laughed, eyelids fluttering shut. "Not once."

Personally, Bertholdt wanted to exclaim on many occasions the feelings he held for Annie were love. Yet, as with many couples, those 3 magical words eluded their relationship thus far. He was afraid using them would scare her away, make her uncomfortable to be around him anymore. Placing too much stock in the relationship on his end would be a costly mistake, or, so he believed.

"Do you think, if we weren't warriors, and we just got to be normal people in Liberio, this would be going on between us?" The question struck as fast as the yellow lighting that transformed them. Bold a question as it may have been, Bertholdt wasn't done yet, "I don't think we'd be together. I don't even think you'd know my name." He wasn't clearly implying anything, whether that she'd simply ignore him, throw a cold shoulder in his direction, or be too infatuated with someone more confident, charismatic, and kind.

Before their numerous years training together, Bertholdt couldn't remember anything about Annie, if he even knew her at all. Those years perfecting their skills to kill their enemies, learning how to master the powers they'd inherit, had been a blessing more so than a curse. After all, they were enjoying the company of one another now, weren't they? The price for their relationship was high, almost too high for some to pay, but not Bertholdt. If he had a chance to relive his life, he'd still follow the path he was on now, if only it ensured he could be with Annie to the end of their days.


2
Wall Rose / Re: All the Little Lights
« Last post by Annie Leonhardt on Today at 12:44:56 PM »
You do.

Such simple, softly spoken words, and so sincere.  They earned Bertholdt a gentle squeeze of his hand, Annie silently wishing she could express what their recent months had meant to her.  For a long time, she had expected a catch or a snag.  Like how she was her father’s daughter only when she was obedient and subservient, only when she performed well and committed herself wholly to her training.  On days where she ached or lagged or cried, she was no child of his, and he disowned her time and again.  If being family required sacrifice, then what did being someone’s partner involve?  But Bertholdt hadn’t placed any expectations on her.  He was just himself, open and willing to meet her deadpan expressions with warm smiles.  Of all people, he deserved to be happy.  Quiet and stoic, he suffered beneath the weight of their shared sins with such grace.

Annie went with him as he wrapped his arms around her and leaned back, her head resting heavy against his chest.  There had been nights like this where she dozed off, lulled to brief stints of sleep by Bertholdt’s warmth, by the steady beat of his heart and rhythm of his breathing.  That, as much as anything else, spoke of how comfortable she was with the tall, green-eyed boy.  But tonight was his birthday and he had Marley on his mind.

‌“I… don’t know that I’d care if Marley was gone,” Annie muttered.  She had screamed as much into Reiner’s bloodied face, all that time ago.  Was it any wonder he doubted her?  ‌“As long as my father - and your family - were safe.”  What she did not say was that there was a certain homeliness to Bertholdt and that, as long as they were together, she was sure they could face anything.  A terrifying notion.  Since when was she stupid enough to give someone so much power over her unbehest?

The mention of the gloves and foot guards almost made the tiny blonde smile.  It was a testament to their craftsmanship that the items hadn’t begun to wear, and that the stitching had yet to come loose, given the hard use they were put to.  Supple leather had softened, moulding to her fingers, the arches of her feet.  Comfortable, enduring and protective.

‌“I love them,” Annie whispered, her voice dipping even lower than its usual quiet cadence.  As with anything important to her, she was secretive, as though she feared anything she cherished would be stripped away from her.  ‌“So much better than linen wraps…”  She ate shamelessly into the space Bertholdt offered, leaning into him as she held up her free hand, slender fingers splayed.  To think that, in her titan form, she crushed soldiers within her grasp, their bones scratching and tickling, blood and gore seeping thickly from her clenched fists.  ‌“Can’t you tell?  Look how soft my hands are getting.”  It was an attempt at humour, her palms still showing as much callus as the rest of the cadets.  What did not show so easily were the aching joints and bruises Bertholdt’s gift had saved her from.


3
Wall Rose / Re: All the Little Lights
« Last post by Bertholdt Hoover on Today at 05:53:13 AM »
Always

This was the key word Bertholdt took away from her response. They weren't going to live long. One way or another, they would die young. Hopefully, if they played their cards right, those precious years could be spent together, back in their hometown.

"You do." It was the simplest response he could conjure, but it was true.

Deep down, Bert knew he didn't deserve the happiness that he'd achieved with Annie. Of all the people on the entire planet, the trio of Warriors perhaps ranked as some of the worst alive. They were directly responsible for tens of thousands of deaths, the mental scarring of thousands more. Reiner was already experiencing the effects, the poor soul. He was easily the most eager of the original quartet to engage Paradis, but now... It was a sad transformation to say the least.

"I wonder sometimes how things have gone back home. If one of Marley's enemies may have declared war, and forced Zeke and Pieck to fight them off alone." He mused these thoughts aloud to her, wrapping both arms around the girl and leaning back on the wall. "Sometimes I think we might not have a home to return to."

Something was obviously troubling Bertholdt. This was the second time he'd mentioned the unpleasant thoughts that'd been plaguing his every thought. He may not have been projecting his issues as outwardly as Reiner was, or as discreetly as Annie, but building up the troubles and stress from their job was catching up to him fast. He believed that having Annie by his side could anchor him to the present.

Shifting the conversation in a more pleasant direction, he then said, "I can't believe I haven't asked you in all these months, but how're you enjoying the leather guards I made for you?" She hadn't made any mention of the gifts in all the months since her own birthday celebration, which worried Bert partially, but she didn't give any indication of disliking the leather gear. "I can probably stitch them up if you ever need any repairs." He offered in congruence, tilting his head ever so slightly, allowing her to lean into his embrace a little bit more.


4
Wall Rose / Re: All the Little Lights
« Last post by Annie Leonhardt on June 02, 2020, 11:16:44 PM »
How lucky she was that Bertholdt took her emotional stumble in his stride.  She seized on his invitation, taking a seat on the ground beside him, anchoring herself to his steady presence. 

‌“If they get caught up in that, they won’t feel a thing,” Annie agreed flatly, her tone level and unemotive.  As far as deaths went, the scorching heat thrown off by Bertholdt’s transformation - one that would burn bones to ash, and reduce entire lives to sooty smudges on the ground - was surely a good one.  Better than any she and Bertholdt could hope for themselves, at least.

Annie followed his gaze to the stars, their distant light catching in her wide, icy eyes.  This far from the smoky braziers of the village, and on a night with crystal clear skies, they sparkled and twinkled vividly.  The seclusion of this place was what she yearned for, to be away from the weight of all eyes that weren’t green, warm and bright.  For all the grimness of their conversation - idly discussing the deaths of those they had come to know - Annie sighed in contentment as Bertholdt took her hand, their fingers threading together, her breath shimmering pale on the frigid air.

The best birthday?  Surely he was just being kind?  But he spoke on with characteristic earnestness and Annie’s gaze drawn to his face, her own features haloed by her fur-trim hood.  Her expression didn’t give much away, save a slight widening of her eyes as she processed all the emotion Bertholdt shared, glimpsing the soul he so freely bared.  There was a beat of silence, then she answered first with a gesture.  Reaching out with her free hand, she traced the line of his jaw, then adjusted the dark hair that spilled across his brow, for no reason other than she liked the way it felt between her cool fingers.

‌“That scarf looks good on you,” she murmured, her muted tone carrying with it a note of fondness.  ‌“You’re coming into yourself, Bertholdt.”  Whether that had anything to do with her or was down simply to time and experience, Annie wasn’t sure, but there was an undeniable shift in her partner.  He grew more bolder, more confident - and rightly so.  Intelligent, fierce and capable, he had in every way earned his place as a Warrior, as the God of Destruction.

‌“I don’t know how I make you happy, but… I hope I always do.”  Even if always wouldn’t be all that long for them, not in the grand scheme of things.  Annie leaned close, close enough to nudge her nose against his - not a clumsy bump this time, but deliberate and affectionate - before kissing him light and lingering.  Bertholdt knew her in ways that nobody else did, he saw the darkness in her but did not look away, he understood that she could feel nothing or everything all at once.

And with Bertholdt, she did feel, her shroud of apathy falling away.  At times, it was a great tangle of emotion she couldn’t hope to pick through or comprehend.  There was desire, burning and fierce, glimpsed on the occasions she kissed him so hard their teeth clashed.  Protectiveness too, of a vicious sort that would see her raze Paradis to the ground to keep him safe - the objective be damned.  If she could suffer to save him pain, she would do it.  Yet beneath that there were softer, gentler feelings she could not define, and a contentment that she supposed must be happiness.  She did not smile often, she never gushed enthusiastically, but she adored him in her own way.


5
Wall Rose / Re: All the Little Lights
« Last post by Bertholdt Hoover on June 02, 2020, 08:32:33 PM »
“Right…” He mumbled, responding to her claiming they’d done it before. He never liked to think about that day, and he’d told her as such in some of their moonlit conversations. It was the only part of their mission thus far that had caused any serious mental distress for him. Nightmares plagued his sleep every other night, but this was a fact he’d hidden from her.

Bert sat down on the floor of the crevice, patting the ground beside him to be joined by the blonde cadet. “I hope they all do. Our… friends. All of them, they deserve a quick death. I hope they get caught up in my transformation.” His words sounded unusually harsh, as if it was Annie speaking through him. There was, however, a truth to his words. Most, if not all, of their cohorts in the 104th would succumb to the Titan hordes brought on by Annie’s scream. Their deaths would be painful, slow, getting ground up in the maws of monsters. Dying in the explosion of Bert’s transformation would be instantaneous, painless.

The raven-haired teen tilted his head back, his gaze wandering among the countless stars and constellations. Somewhere, he knew his family was probably looking up at these same stars, likely preparing for a celebration of what would be his actual birthday on the 30th. Still, no need to ruin her happier than normal mood.

"I figured you'd like this spot. It's secluded. Just for us." He said, placing the lantern off to the side. "Thank you. You've made this the best birthday I can remember." He longingly reached to lace his long, slender fingers with hers, clasping their palms together as one. "Actually, you've made the last 6 months the best they could've been for me. I hope I've at least treated you half as well as you've been towards me." Bertholdt admitted.

"I feel like I've met a whole new person. And like you've changed who I was a lot too. Thank you for that." Bert's words were heartfelt, he meant them as sincerely as he could make them sound. "You make me so happy."


6
Wall Rose / Re: All the Little Lights
« Last post by Annie Leonhardt on June 02, 2020, 03:13:03 PM »
I know a place.

Well now, wasn’t that intriguing?  Annie mused on where it could possibly be as Bertholdt led them away from the bustling streets, the walkways growing steadily quieter as they left behind the shrieks of laughter and thrum of conversation, the spiced and smoky scents of stalls fading away to the crisp, clean air of winter.  He was clever enough to lift a lantern as they went, the flame glowing and flickering behind frosted glass, illuminating them and their path in a soft light.

In the face of such beauty and peace, the mention of graduation - and their plan - caught Annie off-guard.  A shiver rolled through her, one that had nothing to do with the cold, though she managed to keep her expression impassive, as if he had done nothing more than mention a particularly tiresome group project.  Which it was, in a way.

I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have brought that up.  I just started thinking about it when you mentioned the old woman.  I don’t know why…

Annie knew why.  It was because Bertholdt was astute, sensitive to the moods and feelings of others, reading situations and people more clearly than anyone else the blonde had met.  Unlike the mention of the Wall, these words squeezed like a fist around her heart, conjuring an image of Mildred, standing stooped and smiling in her homely kitchen.

‌“We’ve done it before, we’ll do it again,” Annie murmured, speaking so softly Bertholdt might not even have heard her.  She didn’t want him to doubt her, as she suspected Reiner did.  She would do whatever was necessary to bring them home, however abhorrent and irrevocable, even if those actions burned away every last meagre scrap of humanity she possessed.

Thankfully she was distracted by the cabin that loomed out of the darkness, the one Bertholdt and Reiner were rooming in.  For the briefest instance, Annie supposed he was about to invite her inside, and scrambled to figure out what her answer would be.  For all their closeness, for all the quiet conversations and breathless kisses they had shared, intimacy still eluded them beyond the tentative skim and brush of hands over the layers of their clothes.  While Annie would insist the prospect of anything more didn’t frighten her, she couldn’t deny she was a little daunted.

A tug on her hand pulled her from her thoughts, telling her that she was mistaken, that they weren’t where they needed to be just yet.  Snow crunched beneath their boots as Bertholdt led them towards the back of the cabin, Annie hooking loose hair behind her ear as she grappled inwardly with her presumptions.  She would not have readily noticed the indentation, if Bertholdt had not climbed up onto it, heaving her up with him as though she weighed nothing.  Now they were safely tucked away, she surveyed their surroundings, thinking of how tranquil and private this place was.  She wanted to tell Bertholdt that, to say that she was sure they would see stars they had never noticed before on a night so clear and dark and glacial.  What actually passed her lips instead took her by surprise, and demonstrated how his earlier words had resonated with her.

‌“I hope she -” Annie choked, her next sentence arriving in a whispered rush.  ‌“I hope she dies quickly.”  It was a horrendous thing to say about a woman who had treated her with nothing but warmth, but Annie meant it as kindly as possible.  There was no need to say her name, Bertholdt surely knew who she was referring to.  ‌“Her husband was killed when Wall Maria fell.  There was a picture of him on the mantle.  Just a sketch.  Who knows if it even looks like him?  Artists lie all the time.  So stupid.”  Her voice was taking on that staccato rhythm she despised to hear.

Determined to regain control, Annie clenched her teeth tight and turned to stare off into the dark, hiding her face from Bertholdt and the revealing light of the lantern.  Mildred hadn’t even charged her for the cake, or for her time and efforts - only for the ingredients themselves.  Imagine being so lonely that the company of sullen Annie Leonhardt came as a gift.  Imagine loving and missing someone so much as to talk to a scrap of paper bearing a scribble of their likeness.

‌“Never mind…” she muttered to void and to herself, beating her emotions into line with the reminder that the old woman was a stranger, known only for a handful of hours.  By the time Annie turned back to Bertholdt, her expression was bland but brittle, and she stepped closer to the tall, green-eyed boy, as though seeking solace in his proximity.  It was his birthday, after all, like hell was she going to spoil it.  ‌“It’s beautiful here, Bertl.”


7
Wall Rose / Re: All the Little Lights
« Last post by Bertholdt Hoover on June 02, 2020, 05:00:05 AM »
Bertholdt closed the lid on the scrumptious cake, and rose from his seat with her, setting off away from the crowded plaza. In the back of his mind, Bertholdt could see the streets of Marley, on the outside of Liberio. For only a few months, he'd been allowed to experience life as a Marleyan citizen, and not a worthless Eldian Devil.

There had been so many shops and experiences he'd never even knew existed until then. Ice Cream, Theater, and even political discourse. Such things simply didn't exist within the Internment Zone. That is why these numerous stalls and shops were bringing such memories to the forefront of his mind. There were many more great experiences on this Island than he'd expected. And now, he had somebody he could share every single one of them with. "I know a place." His tone was secretive, but joking, like a child keeping a surprise from their parent.

Bertholdt's hand locked in with Annie's as they walked, their boots crushing the snow in unison. Of course, he did have a spot in mind, somewhere he had been spending a good deal of time at, usually when he wasn't with Annie or in training. This night seemed the perfect opportunity to introduce the location to his partner. Soon enough, the loud sounds of the crowd were dying out as they got farther away. Likewise, the population of cadets had seriously thinned out.

Luckily, Bertholdt had snagged a lantern, that way their night-time stroll wasn't unbearably dark. It swayed gently with the cold breeze, as did the tassels of his newly acquired scarf. The light illuminated their way as the pair turned off the paved pathway, and onto the main road to the cabins. In an effort to make conversation while they walked, he spoke up, but soon after he wished he hadn't. "It won't be long now until we graduate. Then... the wall." These were unpleasant thoughts, and he felt stupid for bringing them up. Even with his confident nature around her now, conversation could still pose such an issue at times.

"I'm sorry... I shouldn't have brought that up. I just started thinking about it when you mentioned the old woman. I don't know why..." He apologized quickly, shaking his head slowly.

Just as he finished speaking, they arrived at his secluded spot. They were stood in front of the cabin he and Reiner slept in, but Bertholdt didn't simply lead her into the structure. Instead, he brought her around the side, and then the back, which faced the woods. There was a crevice one could pull them self up into if they'd noticed such a feature on the building. Bertholdt did just that, and then reached down to hoist Annie up with him. Here, on the backside of the cabin, there was a slight indentation, enough space for a few people to sit, even lay down in, and gaze upon the stars.


8
He’s… walking me home?

She watched him for a moment as he turned and then beckoned her. He was being way kinder than she had originally anticipated him to be. She stood, feeling like absolute hell, but she did it in her own power and followed him.

Holding her arm in a shy manner, she caught up to him. “Actually… I walked here. I couldn’t sleep… thought it would help.”

She was visibly relieved that she was not being kicked out of the military by Erwin Smith that night. She walked with discomfort. Her stomach was absolutely retching from her intake and then the stress afterwards. 

She wandered just behind the commander. She wasn’t sure what to talk to the man about. Would he want to partake in small talk from an odd drunk cadet? He didn’t want to leave her in the city, and she was grateful for that… She’d hope all men would do what he’s doing here. She already knew the truth about that, though, which made her feel relieved to walk next to him.

“...Thanks for seeing me back…” she mused.


9
Training Corps Barracks & Grounds / Re: Festive Contraband
« Last post by CressidaGynn on June 01, 2020, 11:26:58 PM »
The snow and frigid wind tapped at the glass windows repeatedly, attempting to get into the building and invade the warmth inside. Cressida’s blue eyes watched as the snowflakes danced and fluttered to the ground in winter’s serenade. The warmth and company of those around her kept her feeling cozy and warm despite the harsh conditions outside. It was… peaceful. That was a feeling that didn’t come often in the military, so she was enjoying every second of it.

Quickly her little daydream was interrupted when she heard the cheerful and excited voice of Sylvia. Her excitement quickly brought her attention to the young woman. In her hands was a package, one that she declared was from her mother. That brought a smile to Cressida’s face. It always warmed her heart when other soldiers received gifts and letters from their loved ones, just the happiness it brought them was truly wonderful. Sylvia lifted a rather elegant looking bottle of wine. The sight of the bottle seemed to make everyone's eyes widen. Wine like that was a rare find, incredibly hard to come across, unless you were in the interior of course, and often not seen by the likes of soldiers.

“Wow, that’s a rather lovely gift!” She commented with a smile, though she could see the look of confusion on Sylvia’s face so she offered some kind of reason for the gift. “Maybe it’s a little something for the holidays… or some other special event like a birthday?”

She had no idea when Sylvia’s birthday was but it was a guess.

“What do you think? Are you going to save it for another special occasion or… something else?” she asked with another small and warm smile.


10
Wall Rose / Re: All the Little Lights
« Last post by Annie Leonhardt on June 01, 2020, 11:17:24 PM »
It seemed doubtful that anything Bertholdt baked had been quite as ludicrously bad as her own culinary misadventures.  If she thrust one of her rockhard cakes into a sock, Annie was quite sure she would be armed with a weapon capable of killing a grown man in a single, well-aimed strike.  Which would be interesting, she had to admit.

Right now, one of the hands capable of terrible misdeeds was captured in Bertholdt’s own.  It remained there, warm and secure, as Annie watched him taste the cake.  She certainly didn’t judge him eating off his fingers, given she had been prepared to eat her muffin out of the grass if it came to it.  His pleasure was irrefutably sincere, and Annie enjoyed the yearning that wove its way through his familiar voice.  A victorious, triumphant feeling unfurled in her chest and she had the sense she might be succeeding at doing something good, for a change.

‌“No thanks needed,” she murmured warmly, giving his hand a fleeting squeeze.

The suggestion of a walk came as an unexpected relief.  It would be nice to leave the worst of the crowds behind, to have more freedom to speak and move.  With a nod, Annie rose, refusing to relinquish her grip of his hand.  Although her fur-trimmed hood remained pulled up, and her head was tilted forwards, it seemed to her that any who recognised the glint of her blonde hair - and her notably short stature - provided a wide berth.  Luckily for them, given the thronging gathering.

Snow crunched pleasantly beneath their boots, splashes of colour spilling from the lanterns that nestled in every nook and cranny or hung glowing from strings above.  Eighteen years of age was supposed to be something special, to mark an official entry into adulthood, but Bertholdt had left behind all boyish things many years ago.  The Marleyan military was no place to spend childhood.  As that thought drifted through Annie’s mind, her hand tightened in his.  They had both been robbed of so much.

‌“Anywhere in particular you want to go, birthday boy?” Annie asked quietly, almost overwhelmed by the options open to them.  If not for Bertholdt, she likely would have stayed back in the cabins the Training Corps had rented, alone.  Instead, she was prepared to do whatever the green-eyed boy wanted to do, and go wherever he wanted to go.  Whether it was to slink away by themselves to some shadowy corner, or to do something uncharacteristically frivolous and carefree.  More than anything, she wanted to see him happy.


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